You should read this book.
06/14/04 10:21 PM
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Scully30
Reged: 02/01/04
Posts: 122
Loc: Overland Park, KS
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Hi...
I only just last week entered therapy for disordered eating. My problem, though the opposite of yours (obsessive calorie-counting, extremely strict dieting to the point of eating double portions of a non-safe IBS food once a week because I felt deprived and paid for it the next day), is similar in that I have dissociated myself from food for so long that I can't remember the last time I truly ENJOYED a meal without guilt of some kind, or been attuned to my hunger and satiety signals. I would not know when my body would be ready to stop eating, so I constantly underate. My body image has been so terrible for so long that when people tell me how great I look or how they wish they had my figure, I am disgusted because I feel like a sow and I can't understand what they are talking about. Most of the time I am totally turned off by myself.
My therapist told me to read "Feeding The Hungry Heart" by Geneen Roth, a recovering binge-eater, bulimic, and chronic dieter who has become sort of a patient-expert. This book is riveting. I have read half of it already, and I have only had it a day. Please read this. There is help out there, and I am going to attempt to get better, even though there is a BIG part of me that still feels like I don't need help, just more diet and liposuction.
Thanks for letting me vent, too.
Jen
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