I'm not sure on my feelings of military or war in general (I don't think I'm informed enough to make any judgements), but I understand your not wanting it to be a direct part of your life. I don't think I could handle it either. I freak out when my husband has to drive long distances. I'm a worrier by nature, and that would just make me crazy. I'm sure Adrian isn't just doing this "because". He must really have a reason and really think it's his best option. I hope you can find someway to at least talk to him about it and make sure you understand. Remember that if he DOES join, your support is going to be really important to him, even if it's hard for you to give. Best wishes, Stephie....