Irritable Bowel Syndrome Message Boards

Thanks everyone for your advice. I really appreciate everyone responding and it has made me feel tons better that I know that there are people who understand my situation.

Unfortunately, my family thinks of me as the oldest grandchild who is the most responsible and reliable out of all the grandchildren. The downside of this is that I am still viewed as a grandchild so am not typically consulted in any major decisions.

This actually became an issue at Christmas when I was yelled at not to sit on any chairs or couches because they were for the adults.

After this incident, I did get a nice email from one of my aunts (by marriage) who recognized what happened and wanted to let me know how much she respected me as an adult and all that I have accomplished. She has gone head-to-head with my other aunts before and because of it, we don't see her, my uncle, or their kids very often. I didn't understand until this party, but I admire her courage to stand up to them - especially when she entered the family by marriage to my uncle.

Because I am so close to my family, I really don't want to make waves at this event for my grandparents. I'm not really sure I should bring my own food after being told not to so I am just going to bring my saltines that I can eat in the bathroom. It is being held in the late morning/early afternoon since my grandma's memory is better then so I can always eat before or afterwards.

Calling the caterer is not an option because I don't even know who the caterer is and would rather not talk to any relatives right now. They would want to know why I needed the info and start an arguement.

As for the presentation, I sent an email to my uncle (who is actually supposed to be in charge of this whole thing) letting him know that when I help him set up the projector, I will bring my laptop with the presentation on it - just in case as back-up.

However, I have decided that I will not be attending the annual Easter Egg Hunt the Saturday following the party - which will make a huge statement. I have never missed a family function and my aunts will be forced to watch their own children during the meal time. In the past, my grandpa has made me plain chicken and a baked potato before dinner so that I could watch the kids for my aunts and uncles during dinner. It worked out fine because then no one questioned why I was a picky eater - they were just thrilled they got a peaceful meal. (Keep in mind I'm the oldest of 13 grandchildren, so it can get quite chaotic!) This way I don't have to do a protest or make a statement on my grandparents' day.

Again, thanks everyone for your advice. I'm still feeling down, but am greatly comforted by everyones' support.

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- Jennifer

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