Just a quick question.. exactly how old are you now?!?
whatever way you put it.. its so hard to be a woman getting an advanced education. Alot of times working moms look down on those with out careers, and woman without careers often look down upon those with them.
I think in todays society there is never going to be a perfect time. it sounds like you are really interested in having a child.. so I say go off birth control and just see what happens. You dont' need to actively plan out rhythms and ovulation schedules, just go about normal life, minus the pill or condoms and see what happens.
its true you dont' want to wake up one day without a child.. and the best part about having one now is that you're already in the PhD program.. and you don't need to find a new job right away. So unless they'll kick you out of school.. nows as good of a time as any.
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Re: Advise me on planning my life (grad students especially!)
