I blew it. Today, I got so depressed thinking that I haven't lost any weight this week that I ate 4 handfuls of Mand M's, and had two slices of meat pie for supper. I feel like giving up. It feels like I'm putting so much energy into counting points and watching what I eat and I'm getting NOTHING in return. It's so frustrating. I know my leader said that I'm building muscle and that it's going to take time, but still. I see all these people at meetings around me losing weight and I'm not budging. It's so discouraging. I know I have no right to complain, but this is SO HARD! I feel trapped. I feel trapped because every time I try to go out to the gym it requires a babysitter. I've tried going after John gets home and I put Quinlan to bed, but he's been working so late lately that I can't get there in time before the gym closes. I can go Sat and Sun, but that's just not enough. I'm doing weightlifting at home, but I know I need more cardio and I just can't get to it enough. This sucky snowy weather isn't making it any easier. I can't push the stroller through the slush/snow so walking is out. I feel so trapped. Maybe I'm not allowed to lose weight. Maybe I'll be stuck like this until the kids get in school. Feeling fat and horrible. Sorry this is so negative. If you made it to the end, thanks for listening to my little tirade.
-------------------- Formerly HanSolo. IBS, OCD, Bipolar, PTSD times 3.
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