It's hard to feel hopeful when you have no one around who understands or even tries to understand. I'm sorry you're feeling so down - I've been there and I really think it would help to tell your doctor and see a counselor about your anxiety. At least you'd have a person to talk to, who would be on your side. I don't know how open you are to trying ADs, but that might be something worth talking to your doctor about. And I don't mean because I think you're depressed, but a low dose of a tricyclic AD might help you manage the pain and make you more regular.
Another thing I recommend, if you can't find anybody to chat to, is to post here as often as you need to. Weekends are slow, but I'm sure someone would reply or just give you some support. I check the boards regularly and I would keep an eye out for your posts. I know it's not like speaking to a "real live" person, but maybe it's a good first step.
It sounds like you're doing all the right things and that you're trying to be patient. It took a few months for me to get regular and see a reduction in pain. I know for some other IBS-Ders it's taken as long as six months. You'll get better and the fact that you can have days without D is a really good sign that what you're doing is working!