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Hi Rosie,
Thank you for your kind words. What you said about the suffering really rang true for me, I remember thinking near the end that I wanted God to just take her away so that she wouldn't have to suffer, and just being so grateful she didn't. I was so busy being grateful about that I didn't deal with the fact that my Mom had just died.
I do have a sibling, a younger sister who was only 13 when Mom died, so it's kinda hard to talk to her because I know she has a hard time too and I'm her support system, so I don't really like to bring anything painful up with her. As for my Dad, we have a really volatile relationship so I'm just not comfortable going there...plus he's engaged now to someone else (which I'm ok with...Mom really wanted him to remarry so he wouldn't be alone) but he sorta just doesn't like to talk about her anymore.
Maybe I will take you up on the offer to "talk" on the internet...I'm on a medical leave from work too so I have time as well. You can email me if you would like...it's vicam7@hotmail.com
Thanks,
Kelly
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Thanks Christine,
I had actually forgotten that about your MIL, sorry if I brought up any bad memories for you  It is hard ... I will try and keep dealing with it, I guess I just keep figuring there is something specific I should be doing...like a 12 step program or something, but maybe it'll just take time. It's ironic, I had planned to talk to my Mom about this since she lost both her parents at a reasonably young age...but again, I thought I had more time. Just goes to show you you never know.
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Thanks Ashley,
I think you may be right about the age thing...it was certainly easy to dull things being in first year university and everything, lots to keep me busy.
Also, my Mom died in September so I am approaching the anniversary, so maybe that has something to do with it.
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Thanks Michele,
So sorry to hear about your first husband, that's terrible! I'm sure you've probably mentioned it before but my memory sucks right now, but I just wanted to say sorry.
I saw my doc today and they think I should have a therpist lined up by the 23rd or so which isn't too bad. In the meantime, I'll just do what I can to get by I guess.
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THanks Tina 
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