social occasions
#38292 - 01/17/04 09:26 AM
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Loriann
Reged: 11/21/03
Posts: 78
Loc: coastal southern California
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Well, I realized that I have, for years, avoided certain social situations that require eating! (Seems as though everything people do revolves around 'bad' foods!). Anyway, today I am facing my fear and going to a women's tea at church - they are having truffles, cream cheese sandwiches, egg salad sandwiches, etc. I don't personally care that I can't eat them - I don't miss eating that, but I am very self conscience about being different. I am, by genetics, a thin person , so when I don't eat at these things people bug me about it and tell me "you're so thin, you need to eat". I'm sick of hearing it and am trying to come up with a good response when people ask me why I'm not eating the food. Anyway, has anyone had this problem, and have any good suggestions of what to say that is simple and won't require some big explaination!? I really don't want to go in the subject of irritable intestines at the table! Thank for any ideas!
Lori
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I'd take along some food I could eat and, if anyone asks, say I had an allergy so my own food is safer. I suppose an allergy is a bit less offensive at the table than talking about irritable bowels! If pushed further to discuss it, I'd just say 'sure - I'll tell you all about it some other time - not while people are eating'. Hopefully that would give them the message to shut-up about it!!
I agree that it's hard, though, and you do feel self-conscious at times.
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I agree, take a potluck dish you can have. It's inviting and who knows you might be a hit with the recipe and open all kinds of doors...
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Those are good suggestions. I have felt the same way in some situations. Very self concious and of course i dont want to say the word bowels at a dinner tabel!!! My husbands family in particulr make life miserable for me. They are all overweight (and currently doing the ATkins diet which hurts my belly just to say it...) so they seem almost resentful that i am thin without trying and always say something a bit snotty when we are out and i pick at the food. If they only knew!!!!!
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I definetely have this problem all the time,and I am very thin also so people are very critical when I dont want to eat. Sometimes I use the excuse that I am having a blood test or a dentist appointment and I am not allowed to eat before it. It sounds silly but it defineltely works- no one bothers me to eat after I tell them that. I have tried saying that i am allergic to certain foods but they just keep offering more and more foods that I cant eat and I always give in to avoid being embarrassed!
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Thin v. IBS
#38469 - 01/17/04 07:42 PM
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Bevvy
Reged: 11/04/03
Posts: 5918
Loc: Northwest Washington State
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Okay, if they resent you for being thin, don't you think if they knew you had IBS and weren't so "perfect" (aka thin), they might lighten up on you a little and maybe wouldn't resent you so much? 
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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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Possibly...but i just try to avoid the whole conversation with them... They can be so pushy...
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Hi SHELLSa; that is the best idea of all. That is about what i do.
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Fortunately, church ladies should be able to understand. I have avoided a lot of awkward situations simply by saying that I have sensitivities to lots of food and can't eat this, or by saying that you ate before you came. If they don't understand, TOUGH. It's better than having an attack. Sometimes, if I feel like it, I do explain IBS - and 9 times out of 10, people know of it and know someone else who has it. PEople are becoming more aware and understanding. As for what to say, it's your choice. Awkwardness will go in time as you get used to saying these things.
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Formerly HanSolo. IBS, OCD, Bipolar, PTSD times 3.
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