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This is a question that I have actually been curious about for a long time but just never thought to ask. Alli, I support you and your question 100% (not that you need it i'm sure, but thats ok) In regards to young ones seeing/hearing about a sex related topic, there are more offensive things (puns and such) in movies like american pie, or scary movie, or hell there are even some, not so appropreate comments for young ones in shrek movies. This is an honest and open question that I didn't think was offensive. I found it more sientific but i suppose i'm sometime too open-minded for my own good.
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Alli
#267214 - 06/02/06 10:38 AM
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hohoyumyum
Reged: 05/28/03
Posts: 2263
Loc: SacTown, CA
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Lordy, lordy, what a controversial topic. I don't think there is anything wrong with this question. If you need to know, you need to know. And where else would you find an answer to a question like this? I think I read that you had other questions you wanted to ask but decided not to because of the reactions you've gotten here. Well, shoot me an e-mail whenever you have them. My e-mail is listed on my profile. I promise I won't be offended by any honest question and there really isn't anything left that is shocking for me to hear. As far as this one goes, for myself, it causes some mild nausea but I haven't noticed any other IBS symptoms coming from it. And, just curious, how old are you?
-------------------- ***********************
If you're not dead, you've still got time.
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You're not too open-minded. I say question everything and listen to all of the answers. Then you can make an educated decision.
-------------------- ***********************
If you're not dead, you've still got time.
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Re: Alli
#267226 - 06/02/06 11:11 AM
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Alli
Reged: 04/23/05
Posts: 195
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Why, thank you. I will email you if I feel the need. Im 17.
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I appreciate the support and I obviously agree with keeping the boards open. I'm not sure if I have broken any barriers or anything, but I hope that people will feel free to ask questions that do concern them. Others who disagree, I personally believe you have a right to disagree, and you also have a right to state the fact that you disagree, however, I do not believe that you should inhibit people to ask important questions. About the semen, I think it could be an individual thing, and it could indeed be unsafe. It really isn't a required sexual act, but I do know that most women ..and even men , have felt pressure from their partner to swallow. I have, so I wondered if it was necessary to not swallow. I think it is, and that's good to know. I guess that's that! Well ..I'm satisfied. Thanks again.
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Excellant call Heather. Those who are worried about the young ones, I truly understand. I have two daughters, but please consider that recent stats (at least the ones I've seen) report that more and more teens are turning to O.Sex & forgoing intercourse as they begin sexual exploration (like it or not, right or wrong)for fear of Aids etc. I'm not saying this is good logic just reality.
I believe this topic is totally appropriate for this board and thank Alli for having the "guts" to ask a question (I'm pretty sure others may have had) & shareing her feelings & research. You go girl!! And thank you Heather
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I've seen the same stats and when I was as young as 12 or 13 I had friends and knew people who were already having sex. Like it or not, parents need to understand that their children have heard about these things and if no one explains things to them, kids will go looking for answers on their own. And that means babies having babies.
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If you're not dead, you've still got time.
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Quote:
For example I remember one where someone asked if others got pain or attacks during and/or after sexual intercourse. People suggested different positions, and other advice.
Absolutely I recall that also--and as a new member, I am researching ANYTHING and everyting I can to discover why, with my radically changed diet, I still feel ill.
Kudos to you Alli for asking questions and trying to seek out information that can better your health. I am appalled to see such intolerance concerning your questions from people who are living with IBS. IBS doesn't necessarily stop once you are in the bedroom with a loved one. I have all sorts of questions about intimate moments and whether they could aggravate IBS--my husband and I are trying to spot what triggers my attacks and if intimacy can be a cause in some way. Alli's question is helpful to me and not offensive because I am here as a researcher and a sufferer, and not in judgment of people's questions and concerns.
Thank you to those who responded to Alli with helpful advice that continued to educate me about IBS and intimacy issues.
Just as a note, if we can't speak candidly as a community about possible IBS triggers, what is the point of this board? I came here desperate for answers--not for people's inflammatory intolerance and prejudice against inquiry.
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IBS-D!
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If we tolerate people asking graphic questions about oral sex, we also need to tolerate other people saying they find those questions offensive. Both sides of the issue should be handled appropriately (no name-calling, no admonitions to leave) and I think this post has been pretty good on that score, although not totally satisfactory on either side.
Oral sex is an uncomfortable issue for many people and failing to be understanding of that fact is just as intolerant as considering any discussion of it to be beyond the pale. Someone who is quite comfortable discussing sex and IBS issues in general way (what position is best, for example, or even "try oral sex if you're bloated") may be quite uncomfortable with a more technical and graphic discussion of oral sex - or of any sex. To refer to people who are uncomfortable with graphic sexual discussions as prejudiced, intolerant, and inflammatory is no more helpful than referring to people who are comfortable with them as sick and sensationalistic.
In case you're wondering which side I come down on (no pun(s) intended), I thought the original question was appropriate - the subject line clearly referred to sex - although it could have been phrased more delicately and the subject line could have carried a more emphatic warning. I thought the follow-up posts were unnecessarily graphic and technical. But of course, as Heather pointed out, I didn't have to keep reading.
In a purely academic way, I am interested in watching this topic get pushed further. Since this thread is considered appropriate, there will eventually be another thread that pushes the discussion further into even more uncomfortable territory, probably - as already presaged - anal sex. Heather did a good job with this one; I don't envy her the future ones.
-------------------- [Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
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-------------------- Heather is the Administrator of the IBS Message Boards. She is the author of Eating for IBS and The First Year: IBS, and the CEO of Heather's Tummy Care. Join her IBS Newsletter. Meet Heather on Facebook!
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